"Oh, leave me alone," I said, turning moodily away.Then, as I paced the room, something made me begin to think that Dubkoff was not altogether a good fellow."There is nothing very much to admire in his eternal jokes and his nickname of 'DIPLOMAT,'" I reflected."All he thinks about is to win money from Woloda and to go and see his 'Auntie.' There is nothing very nice in all that.Besides, everything he says has a touch of blackguardism in it, and he is forever trying to make people laugh.In my opinion he is simply stupid when he is not absolutely a brute." I spent about five minutes in these reflections, and felt my enmity towards Dubkoff continually increasing.For his part, he took no notice of me, and that angered me the more.I actually felt vexed with Woloda and Dimitri because they went on talking to him.
"I tell you what, gentlemen: the DIPLOMAT ought to be christened," said Dubkoff suddenly, with a glance and a smile which seemed to me derisive, and even treacherous."Yet, 0 Lord, what a poor specimen he is!"
"You yourself ought to be christened, and you yourself are a sorry specimen!" I retorted with an evil smile, and actually forgetting to address him as "thou." [In Russian as in French, the second person singular is the form of speech used between intimate friends.]
This reply evidently surprised Dubkoff, but he turned away good-
humouredly, and went on talking to Woloda and Dimitri.I tried to edge myself into the conversation, but, since I felt that I could not keep it up, I soon returned to my corner, and remained there until we left.
When the bill had been paid and wraps were being put on, Dubkoff turned to Dimitri and said: "Whither are Orestes and Pedalion going now? Home, I suppose, to talk about love.Well, let US go and see my dear Auntie.That will be far more entertaining than your sour company."
"How dare you speak like that, and laugh at us?" I burst out as I approached him with clenched fists."How dare you laugh at feelings which you do not understand? I will not have you do it!
Hold your tongue!" At this point I had to hold my own, for I did not know what to say next, and was, moreover, out of breath with excitement.At first Dubkoff was taken aback, but presently he tried to laugh it off, and to take it as a joke.Finally I was surprised to see him look crestfallen, and lower his eyes.
"I NEVER laugh at you or your feelings.It is merely my way of speaking," he said evasively.
"Indeed?" I cried; yet the next moment I felt ashamed of myself and sorry for him, since his flushed, downcast face had in it no other expression than one of genuine pain.
"What is the matter with you?" said Woloda and Dimitri simultaneously."No one was trying to insult you."
"Yes, he DID try to insult me!" I replied.
"What an extraordinary fellow your brother is!" said Dubkoff to Woloda.At that moment he was passing out of the door, and could not have heard what I said.Possibly I should have flung myself after him and offered him further insult, had it not been that just at that moment the waiter who had witnessed my encounter with Kolpikoff handed me my greatcoat, and I at once quietened down--merely ****** such a pretence of having had a difference with Dimitri as was necessary to make my sudden appeasement appear nothing extraordinary.Next day, when I met Dubkoff at Woloda's, the quarrel was not raked up, yet he and I still addressed each other as "you," and found it harder than ever to look one another in the face.
The remembrance of my scene with Kolpikoff--who, by the way, never sent me "de ses nouvelles," either the following day or any day afterwards--remained for years a keen and unpleasant memory.
Even so much as five years after it had happened I would begin fidgeting and muttering to myself whenever I remembered the unavenged insult, and was fain to comfort myself with the satisfaction of recollecting the sort of young fellow I had shown myself to be in my subsequent affair with Dubkoff.In fact, it was only later still that I began to regard the matter in another light, and both to recall with comic appreciation my passage of arms with Kolpikoff, and to regret the undeserved affront which I had offered my good friend Dubkoff.
When, at a later hour on the evening of the dinner, I told Dimitri of my affair with Kolpikoff, whose exterior I described in detail, he was astounded.
"That is the very man!" he cried."Don't you know that this precious Kolpikoff is a known scamp and sharper, as well as, above all things, a coward, and that he was expelled from his regiment by his brother officers because, having had his face slapped, he would not fight? But how came you to let him get away?" he added, with a kindly smile and glance."Surely he could not have said more to you than he did when he called you a cad?"
"No," I admitted with a blush.
"Well, it was not right, but there is no great harm done," said Dimitri consolingly.
Long afterwards, when thinking the matter over at leisure, I suddenly came to the conclusion that it was quite possible that Kolpikoff took the opportunity of vicariously wiping off upon me the slap in the face which he had once received, just as I myself took the opportunity of vicariously wiping off upon the innocent Dubkoff the epithet "cad" which Kolpikoff had just applied to me.
