生活中的幽默随处可见，它是我们生活中的调味品，是轻松生活中不可缺少的一部分。它能帮助人们排忧解难，摆脱尴尬境地，创造轻松愉悦的人际氛围。幽默是智慧的体现。能创造和表现幽默体现了智力的优越，理解和欣赏幽默也需要优越的智力，因为幽默充分发挥语言的特点。幽默在使我们获得愉悦的同时，可以使我们的语言表达更风趣生动。
英语中不乏精彩的幽默故事或笑话。此类故事短小精悍，而其中的一些词汇和句型因其较强的趣味性容易在学生的脑海中留下难以忘怀的印象，同时激发学生学习英语的兴趣。有人说兴趣是最好的老师（Interest is the best teacher。）也有人认为兴趣是快乐之源（Interest is the source of pleasure。）。对英语学习而言，兴趣是原动力，有效的方法才是捷径。以下编写了一些学生喜闻乐见的幽默笑话并配以练习，激发学生学习英语的兴趣和提供良好的学习方法，帮助学习者怀着一份轻松的心情，享受英语给予的无限快乐。
1.God Got An A
A bright young man thought he could talk his way out of anything。 1 Stuck2 by a final exam， he wrote this excuse3 on the paper，“Only God knows the answers。Merry Christmas！”
He got his paper back， marked4“God got an A，5 you got an F。 6 Happy New Year！”
练习：判断下列说法是否正确，正确的说法在括号内填上T（True），反之填上F（False）。
（）1. The student was an A student。
（）2. The examination was very difficult to him。
（）3. The student failed in the examination。
（）4. The student was bright and polite。
（）5. The professor was very humorous。
注释：
1.talk one's way out of something：以花言巧语逃脱做某事
2.stuck：stick的过去时、过去分词，无法摆脱，陷住。例如：The car was/got stuck in the mud。轿车陷在泥里开不动了。
3.excuse：n。借口v。原谅、宽恕。例如：Excuse me。对不起。（打扰他人，不同意，迫不得已而失礼或不赞成时的道歉语）
4.marked：v。评判分数
5.got an A：成绩优秀。字母A在口语中表示头等的，极佳的，比如，an A student优等生
6.got an F：考试不及格。字母F是failure或fail的缩写，表示学习成绩不及格甚至极差的符号。例如：John got an F in math。约翰数学考试不及格，也可说成John failed in a math examination。还有一个以字母F打头的动词是flunk，也表示考试失败、不及格。该词为美式英语，常在口语中使用。例如：
Tom flunked this course。汤姆这门课程不及格。
Both of them flunked English。他俩英语都没有考及格。
参考译文
一名聪明的大学生以为花言巧语可解一切难题。一次他被期终考试难住了，于是在卷子上写下一条理由：“只有上帝知道答案，圣诞节快乐！”
他拿回考卷时见上面判道：“上帝得了A，你得了F。新年快乐！”
练习答案：1.F 2.T 3.T 4.T 5.T
2.Your Father Helped You？
One day， Tim's mathematics1 teacher looked at his homework and saw that he had got all his sums2 right。 The teacher was very pleased and rather surprised。3 He called Tim to his desk and said to him，“You got all your homework right this time， Tim。
What happened？Did your father help you？”
Usually Tim's father did help him with his homework，4 but the evening before this， he had not been able to， because he had not been at home， so Tim answered，“No， sir。 He was busy last night， so I had to do it all myself。”5
练习：判断下列说法是否正确。
（）1. Usually Tim's father helped him with his maths homework。
（）2.Tim's father could get all the sums correct。
（）3. The teacher was surprised at Tim's correct answers。
（）4.Tim's father was no better than Tim in maths。
（）5. In fact， Tim was able to finish his homework all himself。
注释：
1.mathematics：maths或math（美语）的缩略形式，数学。
2.sums：n。算术题目，例如：good at sums擅长算术
3.surprised：吃惊的，通常主语是人，不同于surprising，指某事或物让人惊讶。
4.help sb。with sth。：帮助某人做某事
5.do it all oneself：全部自己干
参考译文
蒂姆的数学老师看了他的作业，发现他全做对了。老师很高兴。同时也十分惊讶。他把蒂姆叫到桌前说：“蒂姆，你这次的作业全作对了，怎么回事？你爸爸帮你做了吗？”
蒂姆的爸爸通常确实帮他做作业，但是头天晚上，因为他不在家就没能帮蒂姆，所以蒂姆回答说：“不，先生，我爸爸昨晚很忙，我只好全部自己做了。”
练习答案：1.T 2.F 3.T 4.T 5.T
3.The Same Mother
Billy and his brother David were in the same class。 The teacher assigned1 them to write a composition“My Mother”。David wrote one and Billy just copied2 it。On the next day， the teacher asked Billy，“How is it that your composition is exactly the same as David's？”3
“We have the same mother， don't we？”replied Billy。
练习：判断下列说法是否正确。
（）1. Billy and David were twins。
（）2.“My Father”was the topic the teacher assigned them to write。
（）3. Billy was more diligent than David。
（）4. David copied Billy's composition。
（）5. Billy was good at making excuses。
注释：
1.assign：v。分配，分派assign sb。to do sth。分配某人干某事assignment n。任务，作业
2.copy：v。抄写，抄袭n。复制品，抄本
3.the same as：与……相同例如：She wears the same dress as you。
参考译文
比利和他的兄弟戴维在同一个班上，老师指定他们写一篇作文《我的母亲》，戴维写了一篇，比利只是照抄一遍。第二天，老师问比利，“你的作文，怎么和戴维的一模一样？”
“我们有同一个母亲，不是吗？”比利回答道。
练习答案：1.T 2.F 3.F 4.F 5.T
4.“Smart”1 Tom and His“Smart”Father
Teacher：Tom， why are you late for school every day？
Tom：Every time I come to the corner， a sign says，2“School—Go
Slow”。 3
Tom：Mum， I got one hundred in two subjects。 4 Mum：Good！What were they？
Tom：Forty in history and sixty in maths。
Tom：Dad， why are you smoking one cigarette after another？5
Dad：Silly boy， don't you know I can save some matches in this way？
练习：判断下列说法是否正确。
（）1. The sign is on the corner。（）2.The sign is for the pupils。
（）3. Tom got one hundred in history and maths。
（）4. Tom's father is a light smoker。
（）5. Tom is as good as his father at talking his way out。
注释
1.smart：聪明的，机灵的，敏捷的
2.a sign says：牌子上写道
3.Go Slow：慢行，同于Go slowly
4.subject：课程，学科
5.one after another：一个接一个
参考译文
老师：汤姆，你为什么每天上学迟到？
汤姆：我每次路过拐角，一个路标上面写着：“学校—慢行。”
汤姆：妈妈，我两门功课得了不得100分。妈妈：好！两门什么功课？
汤姆：历史课得了40分，数学课得了60分。汤姆：爸爸，为什么你一根接着一根地抽烟？
父亲：傻孩子，你不知道这样我能节省一些火柴吗？
练习答案：1.T 2.F 3.T 4.F 5.T
5.I Can Go Home Now
One day after school， the teacher said to his students，“Tomorrow morning， if any one of you can answer my first question。 I'll permit him or her to go home earlier。”1 The next day， when the teacher came into the classroom， he found the blackboard daubed。2 He was very angry and asked，“Who did it？Please stand up！”“It's me，”3 said Bob，“Now， I can go home。Good-bye， Sir！”
练习：判断下列说法是否正确。
（）1. The teacher promised，“First answer， first leave。”
（）2. The next day the teacher found the classroom daubed。（）3.The teacher thought Bob could go home first。
（）4. Bob thought he could leave first。
（）5. Bob went home without his teacher's permission。注释：
1.permit sb。to do sth：允许干某事n。permission
2.daubed：daub的过去分词，涂抹，弄脏。daub n。拙劣的画，涂鸦的作品3.It’s me：习惯用法，而不说It’s I。
参考译文
放学以后，老师对同学们说：“明天上午，如果你们当中的任何一个同学能首先回答我的问题，我就准许他或她最先回家。”第二天，老师走进教室时发现黑板已被乱涂，他非常生气地问：“谁涂的？请站起来！”鲍勃说：“先生，是我，现在我可以回家了，再见！”
练习答案：1.T 2.F 3.F 4.T 5.T
6.Two Birds两只鸟
Teacher：Here are two birds， one is a swallow，1 the other is a sparrow。 2 Now who
can tell us which is which？
Student：I cannot point out3 but I know the answer。 Teacher：Please tell us。
Student：The swallow is beside the sparrow and the sparrow is beside the swallow。
练习：判断下列说法是否正确。
（）1.There are two birds。
（）2. The two birds are the same。
（）3. The swallow is next to the sparrow。
（）4. The teacher knows which is the swallow。
（）5. The student can tell the difference between the two birds。
注释：
1.swallow：n。燕子2.sparrow：n。麻雀
3.point out：把……指出来e。g。The teacher pointed out the mistakes in my
composition。
参考译文
老师：这儿有两只鸟，一只是燕子，另一只是麻雀，谁能指出哪只是燕子，哪只是麻雀？
学生：我指不出，但我知道答案。老师：那你说说看。
学生：燕子旁边的是麻雀，麻雀旁边的是燕子。
练习答案：1.T 2.F 3.T 4.T 5.F
7.The Composition Class作文课
The students in the composition class were assigned1 the task of writing an essay2 on“the most beautiful thing I have ever seen。”The student who， of all the members of the class， seemed the least sensitive3 to beauty， handed in his paper first with astonishing4 speed。 It was short and to the point。5 He had written：“The most beautiful thing I have ever seen was too beautiful for words。”6
练习：判断下列说法是否正确。
（）1. The students were about to write an essay on the most beautiful things。（）2.One of the students were very sensitive to beauty。
（）3. He was the first one to hand in his composition。（）4.He was good at writing beautiful things。
（）5. The boy was smart， but he was not a great writer。
注释：
1.assign：v。给予；指派2.essay：文章
3.sensitive：adj。敏感的4.astonishing：adj。惊人的5.to the point：贴切
6.too beautiful for words：beyond description无法用语言形容
参考译文：
上作文课时，学生们被要求写一篇作文：《我所见过最美丽的东西》，班上那个看起来对美最不敏感的学生，以惊人的速度交了卷。他写的作文简短扼要：“我所见过最美的东西，美得无法以言语形容。”
练习答案：1.T 2.F 3.T 4.F 5.T
8.An Abstract Noun抽象名词
Teacher：What's an abstract1 noun， Jane？Jane：I don't know， madam。 2
Teacher：What， you don't know！Well， it's the name of a thing which you can think of but cannot touch。 Now， give me an example。
Jane：A red-hot poker，3 madam。
练习：判断下列说法是否正确。
（）1. The teacher asks Joan a question。
（）2. At first， she doesn't know the answer。
（）3. The teacher gives an example to illustrate what an abstract noun is。（）4.At last， Jane knows what an abstract noun is。
（）5. Jane gives a good case in point。
注释：
1.abstract：a。抽象的e。g。A flower is beautiful， but beauty itself is abstract。花是美的，但美本身是抽象的。
2.madam：夫人、女士、小姐，这里指称老师。3.poker：火钳
参考译文：
老师：简，什么叫抽象名词？简：我不知道，老师。
老师：什么，你不知道！抽象名词就是可以想像，但是无法摸到的东西的名称。好，给我举一个例子。
简：一支烧得通红的火钳，老师。
练习答案：1.F 2.T 3.F 4.F 5.F
9.I Am My Father是我爸爸
One day little Lisa didn't want to go to school and telephoned1 the teacher pretending2 to be her father and said，“Hello， is that the teacher speaking？My little Lisa caught a cold today and she can't go to school。 She asked me to ask you for a day's leave。”3
The teacher at the other end of the telephone asked，“Who is that speaking？”“It's my father， sir，”answered Lisa。
练习：判断下列说法是否正确。
（）1. Lisa was ill， so she didn't want to go to school。
（）2. Her father asked a day's leave for her on the phone。（）3.The teacher answered the phone。
（）4. Lisa pretended to be her father to ask for leave。（）5.The teacher gave green light to Lisa。
注释：
1.telephone：v。给……打电话，同于phone， call， give sb。a call
2.pretend：v。假装e。g。Lisa pretended to be her father。莉萨假装成她的父亲。3.ask sb。for a day’s leave：向某人请一天假
参考译文：
一天，莉萨不想去上学，就装成爸爸的声调打电话给老师。她说：
“喂，你好，您是老师吗？我的小莉萨感冒了，不能去上学，她叫我向您请一天假。”
老师问道：“您是谁？”
莉萨回答道：“是我爸爸，先生。”
练习答案：1.F 2.F 3.T 4.T 5.F
10.A Brain Transplant
A wealthy man lay critically ill。 1“There's only one thing that will save you，”his doctor said，“A brain transplant。2 It's experimental 3 and very expensive。”
“Money is no problem，”the man said，“Can you get a brain？”
“There are three available。 4 The first was from a university professor， but it'll cost you10，000.”
“Don't worry， I can pay。 What about the second？”
“It was from a rocket scientist。 It'll cost you100，000.”
“I have the money。 And I'd be a lot smarter too。But what about the third？”
“The third was from a government bureaucrat。 5 It will set you back 6half a million dollars”
“Why so much for the bureaucrat's brain？”，the patient asked。“Never been used。”
练习：判断下列说法是否正确。
（）1. The wealthy man needed a heart transplant to save his life。（）2.It's hard to say whether the doctor could succeed。
（）3. The doctor offered three choices。
（）4. The man could pay the first two choices。
（）5. He would choose the third brain because he wanted to be smarter。注释：
1.lay critically ill：lie terribly/awfully ill，病得卧床不起。2.transplant：v。n。移植，移种
3.exprimental：adj。实验的
4.available：adj。可用的，有效的，可获得的5.bureaucrat：官员，官僚，官吏
6.set somebody back：此处是美国俚语，使人花费。也有使人受挫之意。。
参考译文
一个富翁病入膏肓。他的医生说：“只有一个办法可就你的命，大脑移植。这种办法是实验性的而且非常昂贵。”
“钱不成问题。”那富翁说，“你能弄到大脑吗？”
“现在有三个选择。第一个是一名大学教授的，但要花1万美元。”“别担心，我付得起。第二个呢？”
“第二个是一名火箭科学家的。你得付10万美元。”
“这个钱我有。这样我会更聪明些。那第三个选择是什么呢？”
第三个是一名政府官员的。他的脑子将花你50万美元。为什么政府官员的脑子会这么贵？病人问道。
“因为他的脑子从未用过。”
练习答案：1.F 2.T 3.T 4.T 5.F
11.A grain of Sand＆A Cocktail Dress
“Last week a grain of sand1got into my wife's eye， and she had to go to the doctor，”the married man2 told his friend。“It cost me 150 pounds。”
“That's nothing，”his friend replied。“Last week a cocktail dress got into my wife's eye， and it cost me 1500 pounds。”
练习：判断下列说法是否正确。
（）1. A grain of sand is more expensive than a cocktail dress。
（）2. The doctor could see a grain of sand in the married man's eye。（）3.The married man paid more than his friend。
（）4. His friend bought a dress for his wife。
（）5. The two husbands had to pay 1650 pounds。
注释：
1.a grain of sand：一粒沙子。注意英语中的量词，a drop of water一滴水
2.the married man：已婚男子
参考译文
一位已婚男子对他朋友说：“上星期我妻子眼中进了一粒沙子，她去看医生，花了我150镑。”
“那算什么，”他朋友回答说，“上星期一件鸡尾酒会礼服进入我妻子的眼帘，结果花了我1500镑。”
练习答案：1.F 2.F 3.F 4.T 5.T
12.Lose A Day’s Work
A teacher received1 a letter from the mother of one of her pupils：“Dear Miss，
Please don't give Johnny any more homework2. That sum about how long it would
take a man to walk fifty times round Trafalgar Square caused3 his father to lose a day's work。 And after he'd walked it you marked the sum wrong。”
练习：判断下列说法是否正确。
（）1. The teacher got a letter from one of her students。（）2.The student refused to do any more homework。（）3.The father lost a day's work to do the sum。
（）4. The father did the sum by walking。
（）5. The father got the correct sum because he lost a day's work。注释：
1.receive：收到n。receipt
2.homework：不可数名词，家庭作业3.cause：v。引起n。原因
参考译文
某老师收到一个学生母亲的来信：“亲爱的小姐，请你别再给约翰尼布置家庭作业了。一个人绕特拉法尔加广场走过50圈需要多少时间的那道题让他父亲耽误了一天的工作，可当他走完50圈之后，你却判得数是错的。”
练习答案：1.F 2.F 3.T 4.T 5.F
13.Thirty Swindled
A kid selling newspapers on a busy corner in New York City was yelling，1“Read all about it—29 people swindled！”2 A man stopped and bought a newspaper from him。 After reading the headline，3 he said，“Hey， there's nothing in here about 29 people being swindled。”“Read all about it—”shouted the newsboy。“30 people swindled！”
练习：判断下列说法是否正确。
（）1. The kid had swindled 29 people。
（）2. The newspapers always swindled people。
（）3. People could read that 29 people were swindled in the newspaper。（）4.The man bought the newspaper for the news。
（）5. The man was the thirtieth to be swindled。注释：
1.yelling：大叫，吼叫
2.swindle：v。欺骗，诈取，例如：swindle money out of sb。诈取某人钱财n。欺骗，名不符实的货色
3.headline：报纸的标题
参考译文
一个小报童在纽约一个繁华的街角尖声叫卖，“看报，看报—29人上当受骗！”一位男士停下脚步，从他那里买了一份报纸。在读完标题后他说，“嘿，根本没有29人受骗的事儿啊。”“看报，看报—”小报童大声喊着。“30个人上当受骗！”
练习答案：1.T 2.F 3.F 4.T 5.T
14.Want A Nightmare
Before the final examination， John told his mother，“Mom， I had a dream last night that I'd passed today's exam。”“Don't trust dreams。 They usually turn out to be1 the opposite。”2 Mother replied。“Then I do hope3 I'll fail the other subjects in my dream tonight，”John said。
练习：判断下列说法是否正确。
（）1. John dreamed that he had passed the exam。（）2.John's mother believed that he would fail。（）3.John hoped the he would pass the exam。
（）4. His mother dreamed that he had passed the exam。（）5.John was afraid that he wouldn't pass the exam。注释：
1.turn out to be：原来是，结果是（出乎意料）2.the opposite：反面
3.I do hope：我真心希望……（强调句型）
参考译文
在期末考试之前，约翰告诉他的母亲：“妈妈，我昨天晚上做了一个梦，梦见我通过了今天的考试。”“不要相信梦，亲爱的。据说梦中的经历通常与现实相反。”妈妈答道。“那么，我真希望在今晚的梦中，我的其他功课都不及格。”约翰说。
练习答案：1.T 2.F 3.T 4.F 5.T
15.Who Dare Touch My Teeth
The dentist1said to the patient，“Don't be afraid and drank the brandy。”2“The patient grasped3 the bottle and drank up the wine quickly。”“Are you afraid or not？”the
dentist asked。
“Afraid？”the patient roared，4“Let me see who dare touch my teeth！”练习：判断下列说法是否正确。
（）1. The patient was afraid of the dentist。
（）2. The dentist asked the patient to drink wine before operation。（）3.The patient wouldn't like wine。
（）4. The dentist wouldn't touch the patient's teeth。（）5.The patient was afraid of the operation。
注释：
1.dentist：牙医
2.brandy：白兰地酒3.grasp：抓住
4.roar：v。咆哮、吼叫，n。隆隆声
参考译文
牙科医生对病人说：“别害怕，把这些白兰地喝下却，”病人抓起瓶子，很快喝完了瓶里的酒。“还怕不怕？”医生问。
“怕？”病人咆哮道，“看谁敢动一动我的牙齿！”
练习答案：1.F 2.T 3.F 4.T 5.T
16.A Bookworm’s Wedding Night
James was a famous scholar1 who married rather late in his life。 In the wedding2 night the bride3 found her husband reading instead of attending to her。4
“I wish I were a book，”she said， sighing。 5
“Why do you want to be a book for？”James asked with surprise。“You would be more interested in me， then。”
After serious thinking， he finally said to his bride：“I‘m afraid that wouldn't do， my dear。 You see， when I finish reading a book， I always start with another。Do you
want me to do the same thing with you？”练习：判断下列说法是否正确。
（）1. The husband was more interested in reading。（）2.James married very late。
（）3. The bride felt sad in the wedding night。（）4.The bride didn't attend to her husband。
（）5. James seldom started with a new book after he finished one。注释：
1.scholar：学者
2.wedding：n。婚礼，婚庆
3.bride：新娘，bridegroom新郎
4.attend to：关心，用心，在意。例如：attend to one’s work用心从事自己的工作
参考译文
詹姆斯是一个有名的学者，他结婚很晚。新婚之夜，新娘发现她的这位丈夫不理睬自己，只顾自己看书。
“我希望我自己是一本书，”她叹着气说。
“为什么你希望自己是一本书呢？”詹姆斯吃惊地问。“那样你就能对我更有兴趣了。”
詹姆斯沉思了一会儿后对她说：“亲爱的，恐怕那不行。你知道我看完一本书后总是又开始看另外一本。你愿意我也同样地对待你吗？”
练习答案：1.T 2.T 3.T 4.T 5.T
17.Nine Dollars， Then那我给你9美元吧
Mrs。 Smith wanted to buy the picture of a young girl。She went to the shopkeeper1 and asked，“How much do you want for this picture？”
The shopkeeper turned the picture round。 He looked at the back of it and then said，“Thirteen dollars。”
“Thirty dollars？”Mrs。 Smith said。“That's very expensive。I'm going to offer2 you twenty dollars for it。”
“I said，‘Thirteen dollars'，not‘Thirty dollars'”，the man answered。
“Thirteen？”Mrs。 Smith said。“Then I'm going to offer you nine dollars for it。”
练习：判断下列说法是否正确。
（）1. Mrs。Smith went into a shop to buy a picture。（）2.The price was in the picture。
（）3. The shopkeeper asked for thirty dollars。（）4.She only wanted to offer thirteen。
（）5. The shopkeeper was very greedy。
注释：
1.shopkeeper：店主
2.offer：v。提出，提供，出价
参考译文
史密斯夫人想买那幅画着一个年轻女子的画像。她走到店主面前问：“这张画多少钱？”
店主把画翻过来看了看背面说：“13美元。”
“30美元？”史密斯夫人说。“太贵了，我给你20美元。”“我说的是13美元，不是30美元。”店主回答说。
“13美元？”史密斯夫人说。“那我给你9美元吧。”
练习答案：1.T 2.F 3.F 4.F 5.F
18.Buying A Hat买帽子
A lady went to a hat shop to buy a hat。 As she was very fussy，1 it took her a long time to pick on one。2 Already at the end of his patience，3 the salesman was afraid that she might change her mind again so he tried to flatter her，“An excellent choice， madame。You look at least ten years younger with this hat on！”To his dismay，4 the lady took of her hat at once and said，“I don't want a hat that makes me look ten years older as soon as I take it off。5 Show me some more hats。
练习：判断下列说法是否正确。
（）1. The lady made a quick choice。（）2.The salesman was very patient。（）3.He really liked the lady's choice。
（）4. The hat made her look ten years older。
（）5. The salesman had to offer the lady more hats。
注释：
1.fussy：挑剔的。make a fuss of大惊小怪
2.pick on：挑选，同于pick out；pick up捡起，拾起；pick at挑剔，找毛病3.patience：耐心。patient adj。耐心的；n。病人
4.dismay：n。惊慌，丧胆，沮丧5.take off：摘下，脱下
参考译文
一位妇女到一家帽子店买帽子。她很挑剔，用了很长时间才选好了一顶。已经忍耐到极点的售货员害怕她再改变主意，便恭维她：“你作了极好的选择，夫人。你戴上这顶帽子看上去起码年轻10岁！”但令他沮丧的是，这位女士却马上摘下她的帽子说：“我不想要一顶摘下来便使我立刻显得老10岁的帽子。多拿一些帽子来给我看看！”
练习答案：1.F 2.T 3.F 4.F 5.T
19.The Only Remedy唯一的补救方法
A neighbour intended to1 make fun of 2Jack and told him，“Last night a mouse crept into3 my stomach while I was sleeping。 What shall I do？”
“What you must do at once is to find yourself a live cat and swallow it。 That's the only remedy4 for you，”was Jack's immediate rejoinder。5
练习：判断下列说法是否正确。
（）1. The neighbor wanted to make fun。
（）2. He had swallow a dead mouse。
（）3. Jack advised the neighbor to find a cat alive。（）4.The only remedy is to let the mouse creep out。（）3.Jack made fun of the neighbor at last。
注释：
1.intend to do sth：打算做某事
2.make fun of sb。：同某人开玩笑，捉弄某人3.creep into：爬进
4.remedy：n。治疗（法），矫正（法），补救（法），药物v。治疗，矫正5.rejoinder：n。答语，回答，反驳。v。rejoin回答，应答，再加入
参考译文
杰克的邻居想跟他开个玩笑，便对杰克说：“昨天晚上我睡觉的时候，有只老鼠爬进了我的肚子，我该怎么办呢？”
杰克随即回答说：“你必须立刻找一只活猫吞下去，这是唯一的补救方法。”
练习答案：1.T 2.F 3.T 4.F 5.T
20.I Just Gave It A Drink不过让它喝点茶
One day Jim attended1 a wedding。 One of the guests not only ate a lot of the
sweetmeats2 offered， but stuffed his pouch3 with them。 When Jim saw what the guest
was doing， he picked up a tea pot and quietly， from behind， poured some tea into the
guest's pouch。 When the guest discovered what Jim had done， he was not at all
abashed4 but reproached5 Jim。“What's my pouch got to do with you that you come and pour tea into it？”
“I meant no harm，”was Jim's defence。 6“When I saw how many sweets your
pouch had tucked in，7 I was afraid it would get thirsty。 That's why I gave it a drink。”
练习：判断下列说法是否正确。
（）1. One guest filled his pouch with sweetmeats。（）2.The guest didn't eat any sweets。
（）3. Jim was abashed because he was reproached。（）4.Jim had eaten too much sweetmeats。
（）5. Jim made fun of the guest。
注释：
1.attend：v。出席，参加；n。attendance 2.sweetmeat：糖果，甜品，蜜饯
3.pouch：n。袋子，袋状物；v。装入袋中
4.abashed：abash的过去分词，局促不安，难为情5.reproach：v。责备
6.defence：同于defense（美语）n。防御，防卫；v。defend 7.tuck in：大吃，尽情地吃
参考译文
有一天，吉姆参加了个结婚宴会。有位客人不仅吃了许多糖果，而且还使劲往衣袋里塞。当吉姆看明白这位客人在干什么后，便拿起了一把茶壶，悄悄地从客人背后把茶往他衣袋里倒。客人发觉后不但不觉得难为情，反而责骂吉姆说：“我的衣袋惹着你啦，你干吗往里面倒茶？”
“没什么恶意，”吉姆回答道。“我看见你的衣袋吃了这么多糖，担心它会口渴，不过让它喝点茶罢了。”
练习答案：1.T 2.F 3.F 4.F 5.T
21.Unreasonable Complaint无理的抱怨
Two friends were having dinner together。 There was only one dish with two fish in it， one larger and the other smaller。1 One of the friends got the larger fish and the
other was very angry。
“How selfish you are！”he cried。“Why？”his friend was surprised。“You've go the larger fish。”
“What would you do if you were me？”
“I'm sure I would choose the smaller one。”
“Then what are you complaining of？2 You've got your smaller fish。”练习：判断下列说法是否正确。
（）1. There was only one dish on the table。
（）2. One of the friends got the larger fish， while complaining。
（）3. The friend who got the smaller dish was very angry。
（）4. The other friend was sure that he would choose the smaller one。（）5.Both of the friends were selfish。
注释：
1.one……the other……：（两个中的）一个……另一个……2.complain of：抱怨；n。complaint
参考译文
两个朋友一起吃饭，桌上有一盘鱼，盘中只有两条鱼，一大一小。其中一位夹了大鱼吃，另一位很生气。
“你太自私了！”他嚷道。
“为什么？”他的朋友感到很惊奇。“你那了大的。”
“如果你是我，你会怎么做？”
“我当然会选小一点儿的。”
“那你有什么好抱怨的？你已经得到了小一点的。”
练习答案：1.T 2.F 3.T 4.T 5.T
22.Two Hearts Beating两颗心脏在跳动
Nurse：How do you feel after your operation？
Patient：Quite alright，1 only I can feel two hearts beating inside me。
Nurse：No wonder2 the doctor who operated on3 you were looking for his
watch everywhere just now。
练习：判断下列说法是否正确。
（）1. The patient just had an operation。（）2.He didn't feel all right。
（）3. There were two hearts in his body。
（）4. The doctor who had given him an operation lost his watch。（）5.Probably the doctor could find his watch nowhere but in the
patient's body。
注释：
1.alright：all right
2.No wonder……：难怪……
3.operate on sb。：给某人做手术
参考译文：
护士：手术后你感觉怎样？
病人：很好，只是我能感觉到在我体内有两颗心脏在跳动。
护士：怪不得给你做手术的大夫刚才在到处找他的手表。
练习答案：1.T 2.T 3.F 4.T 5.T
23.A Boy’s Gagging童趣
A family invited1 an older man to dinner， who arrived without his teeth！After he left， the family discussed the unusual2 situation，“Well，”suggested five-year-old Teddy，“Maybe he thought it was informal3.”
练习：判断下列说法是否正确。
（）1. An older man was invited to an informal dinner。（）2.He had lost all his teeth。
（）3. The family was surprised to see the old man without teeth。（）4.The old man didn't eat much at the dinner。
（）5. Teddy thought the dinner was informal。注释：
1.invite：邀请
2.unusual：不寻常的，usual的反义词。
3.informal：非正式的，formal的反义词。参考译文：
有一家人邀请一位长者共进晚餐，而他却没戴假牙就来了。他走勒后，全家人对这一出乎寻常的事情议论纷纷。五岁的特迪发表了自己的见解：“嗯，或许他认为这是一次非正式的晚餐。”
练习答案：1.F 2.T 3.T 4.T 5.F
24.An Act of Kindness善意之举
One afternoon， a man was riding in the back of his limousine1 when he saw two men eating grass by the road side。 He ordered his driver to stop and he got out to investigate。“Why are you eating grass？”he saked one man。“We don't have any
money for food，”the poor man replied。“Oh， come along with me then。”
“But sir， I have a wife with two children！”
“Bring them along！And you， come along too！”he said to the other man。“But sir， I have a wife with six children！”The second man answered。
“Bring them as well！”
They all climbed into the car， which was no easy task， even for a car as large as the limo2. Once underway3，one of the poor fellows says：“Sir， you are too kind。Thank you for taking all of us with you。”The rich man replied，“No， you don't understand， the grass at my home is about two meters high！”
练习：判断下列说法是否正确。
（）1. The man was surprised to see two men eat grass。
（）2. He stopped his car to see what was happening。
（）3. The poor man said they were too poor to have food。（）4.The man offered the poor a ride。
（）5. The rich man was so kind to the poor that he wanted to give them food。
注释：
1.limousine：豪华高级轿车
2.limo：limousine的缩写形式
3.underway：adj。启动的，在行进中的
参考译文：
一天下午，一位坐在豪华轿车后座的男士看见两个男人在吃路边的草，他命令司机停车并下车去看个究竟。“你为什么要吃草？”他问其中的一个。“因为我们没钱买食品，”那可怜的人回答说。
“那跟我来吧。”
“可是先生，我还有妻子和两个孩子！”
“把他们都带来！还有你也一块来！”他对另一个人说。“可是，先生，我有妻子和六个孩子！”第二个人告诉他。
“把他们也带上！”
他们一起钻进车里，尽管是豪华轿车，挤下这么多人还是不容易。车已经开动了，其中一个穷人说道：“先生，您太善良了。谢谢您把我们都带上。”富人回答说，“不，你误解了，我家的草都快两米高了！”
练习答案：1.T 2.F 3.T 4.F 5.F
25.Who Is the Laziest？谁最懒得
Father：Well， I talked to your teacher today， and now I want to ask you a question。
Who is the laziest1 person in your class？
Ben：I don't know， father。
Father：Oh， yes， you do！Thank！When other boys and girls are doing and writing， who
sits in the class and only watches how other people work2？
Ben：Our teacher， father。
练习：判断下列说法是否正确。
（）1. The father have had a talk with the teacher。（）2.The father doesn't know who is the laziest。
（）3. Ben sits in the class and only watches how other boys and girls work。（）4.Ben knows who is the laziest in the class。
（）5. The teacher is as lazy as Ben is。
注释：
1.laziest：形容词lazy的最高级形式，比较级为lazier。
2.watch sb。do sth。：欣赏/观察某人做某事，注意do为不带to的不定式形式。
参考译文：
父亲：哎，本，今天我给你们老师谈过。现在我想问你一个问题：你们班上谁最懒？
本：我不知道，爸爸。
父亲：哦，不对，你一定知道！想想看，当别的孩子都在做作业、写字是，谁在课堂上坐着，光看人家做功课？
本：我们老师，爸爸。
练习答案：1.T 2.F 3.T 4.F 5.F
26.A Good Boy好孩子
Little Robert asked his mother for two cents。
“What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday？”“I gave it to a poor old woman1，”he answered。
“You're a good boy，”said the mother proudly2.
“Here are two cents more。 But why are you so interested in3 the old woman？”“She is the one who sells the candy。”
练习：判断下列说法是否正确。
（）1. Little Robert had spent four cents for a poor old woman。（）2.He was ready to help others。
（）3. At first， his mother was very proud and happy。（）4.Little Robert was interested in the old woman。（）5.He liked eating candies。
注释：
1.give sth。to sb。：给某人某物，也可以表述为：give sb。sth。2.proudly：adv。骄傲地；adj。proud骄傲的
3.be interested in sb。/sth。：对某人或某事感兴趣。
参考译文：
小罗伯特向妈妈要两分钱。
“昨天给你的钱你拿去干什么了？”
“我给了一个可怜的老太婆。”他回答说。
“你真是个好孩子。”妈妈骄傲地说，“再给你两分钱，可是你为什么对那位老太太那么感兴趣呢？”
“只有她在卖糖果。”
练习答案：1.F 2.F 3.T 4.F 5.T
27.I Have His Ear in My Pocket他的耳朵在我口袋里
Ivan came home with a bloody1 nose and his mother asked，“What happened？”“A kid bit2 me，”replied Ivan。
“Would you recognize3 him if you saw him again？”asked his mother。“I'd know him anywhere，”said Ivan。“I have his ear in my pocket。”
练习：判断下列说法是否正确。（）1.Ivan had a fight with a kid。（）2.The kid’s nose was bleeding。
（）3. Ivan's mother didn't know who the kid was。（）4.The kid had an ear bitten off。
（）5. Ivan with a bloody nose was fiercer than the kid with a missing ear。
注释：
1.bloody：adj。血淋淋的。英语中许多形容词由名词 y构成，如：rainy， cloudy， snowy， chilly， sunny， foggy， misty， milky， mighty， handy等等。
2.bit：bite的过去时态，过去分词为bitten。3.recognize：v。认出，n。recognition。
参考译文：
伊凡鼻子流着血回到家里。他妈妈问：“发生了什么事？”“一个男孩药了我一口。”伊凡说。
“如果在看到他，你能认出他来吗？”妈妈问。
“无论他走到哪里我都能认出来，他的耳朵还在我的口袋里呢。”伊凡说。
练习答案：1.T 2.F 3.T 4.T 5.T
28.It’s Not My Fault不要怪我
There was once a local government official who loved his only son very much。 However， the boy was very foolish and often made other people unhappy by his untactful1 language。
One day the official was invited2 to a party。 His son said，“Pop， you haven't brought me to any parties for a long time。Please take me with you this time。”
The father said，“No。 This party will be held in a very rich house。It is for the first birthday of their son。There will be a lot of important people present3 and I am afraid that you would……”
“No， Pop。 I'm sure not to say anything rude4 at the party。Please！Please！”The boy was taken to the party。He obeyed his father this time， and said
nothing for almost the whole evening。 Then， when the party was about to end5 and all the guests stood up， he stood up too and said，“You know， everybody， I haven't said anything today。So if the baby dies this year， it's not my fault。”
练习：判断下列说法是否正确。
（）1. The son was the apple of the official's eye。
（）2. He was not very smart， but he could speak tactfully。
（）3. The official intended to take his son to the birthday party。（）4.The boy didn't say too much this time。
（）5. The baby in the rich house would die soon。
注释：
1.untactful：adj。不圆滑的，不得体的。反义词为tactful。
2.was invited to：被邀请参加，英语中被动语态的构成为be p。p。过去分词。3.present：此处为adj。出席，到场的。
4.say anything rude：注意形容词rude修饰不定代词anything时放在之后，类似的例子如：something important；anything interesting；somebody fun等等。
5.was about to end：即将结束，be about to do sth。即将、正要做某事，例如：We are about to set out。我们即将动身。
参考译文：
有一位地方政府官员很爱他的独生子。然而，他的儿子很愚蠢，常说一些不得体的话，使别人扫兴。
一天，这位官员应邀参加宴会。他儿子对他说：
“爸爸，你好久没有带我去参加宴会了，这次请你带我去吧。”
官员说：“不行。这次宴会是一户有钱人家为庆贺他们的儿子周岁举办的，会有很多重要人物参加，我怕你会……”
“不会的，爸爸，我保证不会在宴会上说什么无礼的话。拜托了！”
于是男孩就被带去参加宴会了。这次他听爸爸的话，几乎整个晚上一句话都没说。宴会即将结束，客人们都站了起来，着男孩也站起来说道：“大家都看到了，我今天可是什么也没说。所以如果这孩子今年死了，可不要怪我哦。”
练习答案：1.T 2.F 3.F 4.T 5.F
29.Mr。Exact“精确”先生
One day， Mr Exact was standing at the door reciting a text1 word by word when a stranger came up to him and said，“Excuse me， but could you tell me where the department store2 is？”
“Sure，”answered Exact。“You must go across the bridge and then turn right。 The bridge is only 20 metes long。”
The stranger thanked him and went on his way3. He was still walking across the bridge when someone suddenly called out from behind him。“Look out！”4 The stranger turned around and found it was Mr。Exact。
Breathing shallowly5，Mr。 Exact said，“I'm sorry that I gave you the wrong directions6.I have come to tell you that the bridge is 40 meters long， not 20 meters as I originally7 said。If you go 20 meters and then turn right， you will fall into the water as I did a couple of years ago when someone gave me the same directions。”
练习：判断下列说法是否正确。
（）1. Mr。Exact was careful enough about reciting texts。
（）2. The stranger asked Mr Exact for the direstions to the department store。
（）3. The department store was on the opposite side of the house where Mr。Exact
lived。
（）4. Originally， the bridge was 20 meters。
（）5. Mr。Exact had fallen into the river because he was too exact。
注释：
1.recite a text：背诵课文，相当于learn the text by heart或memorize the text。2.department store：百货公司
3.went on his way：继续赶路
4.look out：当心，类似于watch out。5.shallowly：adv。呼吸浅的
6.gave the directions：指路；give the wrong direstions指错路。7.originally：adv。先前，相当于previously。
参考译文：
一天，“精确”先生站在门口逐字逐句地背诵课文。一个陌生人走过来说：“对不起，可不可以告诉我百货公司在哪里？”
“精确”先生说：“当然可以。你必须走过这座桥，然后往右转。这座桥只有二十米长。”
陌生人说了声谢谢就走了。他正走在桥上时，忽然有人在背后喊：“小心！”陌生人回过头一看，是“精确”先生。
“精确”先生气喘吁吁地说：“对不起，我给你指错路了。我特地来告诉你，这座桥有四十米长，并不像我刚才讲的只有二十米长。如果你只走二十米就向右转，你会掉进水里的。几年前别人就是这么告诉我的，结果我就掉进水里了。”
练习答案：1.T 2.T 3.T 4.F 5.T
30.Napoleon Was Ill拿破仑病了
Jack had gone to the university to study history， but at the end of his first year， his history professor failed1 him in his examinations， and he was told that he would have to leave the university。 However， his father decided that he would go to see the professor to persuade2 him to let Jack continue his studies3 the following year。
“He's a good boy，”said Jack's father，“and if you let him pass this time， I'm sure he'll improve a lot next year and pass the examinations at the end of it really well。”
“No， no， that's quite impossible，”replied4 the professor immediately。“Do you know， last month I asked him when Napoleon died？He didn't know！”
“Please， sir， give him another chance，”begged5 Jack's father，“you see， I'm afraid we don't take any newspaper in our house， so none of us6 even know that Napoleon was ill。”
练习：判断下列说法是否正确。
（）1. Jack was so good at history that he went to the university to study history。（）2.Failed in the examinations， Jack had to leave the university。
（）3. Jack's father decided to persuade Jack to go on studying history。（）4.Napoleon died last month。
（）5. Jack's father was worse than Jack in history。
注释：
1.fail：vt。使某人考试不及格
2.persuade：v。劝说，persuade sb。to do sth。劝说某人做某事
3.let sb。do sth。：让某人做某事，注意let后的宾语补语不带to。4.replied：v。回答，动词不定式为reply。
5.begged：v。乞求，beg的过去时。6.none of us：我们中没有一人
参考译文：
杰克考入一所大学学习历史。第一学期结束时，历史课教授没让他及格，学校让他退学。然而，杰克的父亲决定去见那位教授，劝其改变主意，让杰克继续来年的学习。
“他是个好孩子，”杰克的父亲说：“你要是让他这次及格，我相信他明年会有很大的进步，期末一定会考好的。”
“不，不，那不可能，”教授马上回答，“你知道吗？上个月我问他拿破仑什么时候死的，他都不知道。”
“先生，请再给他一次机会吧。”杰克的父亲说：“您不知道，恐怕是因为我们家没有订报纸，我们家的人连拿破仑病了都不知道。”
练习答案：1.F 2.T 3.T 4.F 5.T
